Monday, July 26, 2010

Fleeting Moments

I hadn't realized until just recently how long it had been since I wrote anything here. It is certainly not for lack of anything happening. In fact, it's more likely due to the sheer volume of things that seem to be always going on. This summer has been absurdly busy and being plagued by pregnancy induced exhaustion does not help in the least. I remember being tired when I was pregnant with Wade, but I don't remember being this tired. Of course, when I was pregnant with Wade I wasn't also trying to keep up with a 3.5 year old; I was merely working and going to school full time; piece of cake in comparison! Anyway, enough of me and on to the Master of the House, Wade. There is so much to tell. Where does one start? I think I'll start with something that hit me hard as a bag of bricks recently; how fleeting the moments really are.

Wade has been a challenge to potty train. Let me repeat. A challenge. He has had absolutely no interest in potty training. I, on the other hand, have been ready for it for about 2 years now. Before even broaching the subject with Wade I had read 3 books on the subject and read countless websites regarding the different processes and schools of thought. I had spoken to multiple mothers who had blazed the potty training trail before me. I was armed with knowledge and lots of it. Unfortunately, and completely unknown to me, I was also armed with an incredibly disinterested and stubborn little boy. The boy had no interest in using the toilet. I tried everything; floating targets, bribery, star calendars, peer pressure (I can only hope and pray that he is that resilient to peer pressure later in his life because I pushed that one pretty hard), I used Sweet Juniper's drawings (he was upset because the pooping characters looked upset - I thought for sure Caillou pooping would do the trick), I tried dropping the subject for months at a time hoping that revisiting the subject at a later date would be met with more interest. Nope. Nothing. Nada. He was completely resilient to everything. It was maddening. And you know, a 3 year old's poop is not unlike that of an adults; it smells just as bad and there seems to be just as much of it. It's really and truly disgusting. I had had it.

So, just as I was starting to wonder how I would even be able to enroll him in any sort of preschool the unthinkable happened. He asked to use the bathroom! I was shocked but calmly escorted him to the bathroom where he sat down and actually peed in the toilet. I was overjoyed. I screamed. I jumped up and down. I gave high-fives. I had tears of utter happiness fill my eyes. I was ridiculously happy for what was probably an ounce of pee in the toilet; but, it was true happiness, real pride and it was very exciting. My son had just peed in the toilet.

About a half hour later I was lying in bed silently smiling to myself and our potty training success when it hit me. My son had just peed in the toilet. My baby boy had just peed in the toilet. My baby boy wasn't a baby anymore. My perfect, little baby boy was on his way to growing up. Oh my god... he's 3.5 years old and he's peeing in the toilet. Where did the time go? How do I slow it down? I'm not ready for this. I started to cry. The time has just flown by and I haven't been paying close enough attention. It wasn't that long ago that Wade was just this tiny, well, okay, he was never tiny... but he was a baby. He slept in my arms and he cooed and smiled at me with that big beautiful toothless smile. Now he's too busy to cuddle, he talks in full sentences (often back-talks in full sentences) and that still beautiful smile is full of teeth that need to be brushed regularly.

I realized that I have to remember to write this all down again because I'm going to forget these moments and I don't ever want to forget them. These are the moments that life is made of. These are the moments that really count. These are the moments that are going to make Wade the man he will eventually become. These are truly just the fleetingest of moments.

So, consider that realization my current vow to keep up on the posts. If nothing else, I need to write them for posterity's sake.

What I'm listening to right now: "When My Time Comes" - Dawes


Cheers!




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